Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Don't look Now but Your Sheep are showing

Praise the Lord! I pray that everyone has been enjoying the many blessings of God. I and my wife Ruth are standing on God's word and counting our blessings as we  weather storm after storm in our lives, but we are not worried because Jesus is on the boat with us and we know that any minute now He's going to stand up and say "peace be still" to our storms.

Despite what I said in my last post about giving my all to God I find myself still struggling with the sideshows of life. When the main attraction should be God and his word I still find myself at times unable to turn from the T.V. shows and the nether lands of surfing the net. I at times would ask God when the storms came "why me? I've done all you have asked of me." I stopped asking Him that question after some close self-examination. A Lot of Christians including myself have a tendency to only remember the things we have been obedient about while rationalizing and suppressing the things we were not obedient about. An example of this is in 1st. Samuel 15: 13+14
13And Samuel came to Saul: and Saul said unto him, Blessed be thou of the LORD: I have performed the commandment of the LORD.
14And Samuel said, What meaneth then this bleating of the sheep in mine ears, and the lowing of the oxen which I hear?
If you read the whole chapter you will find out that God, through His prophet Samuel had told Saul
3Now go and smite Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not; but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass.
But Saul did not do that, he decided to spare Agag the King along with the best sheep and oxen. To make matters worst Saul was approached by Samuel and the first thing he did was start to brag about how he had carried out God's will and when Saul questioned him he made the  excuse that he had spared the best in order to make a sacrifice to God.

I'm sure on the surface it sounds reasonable to most of us, why not? you might ask, I did the main thing I destroyed the Amalekites and wiped them from the face of the earth. I can remember a time when the Lord spoke to me and made it clear that there was a certain ministry and minister that He wanted me to confront and condemn because they were corrupt. I did not want to do it. I said, "Lord who am I that I should speak out against this ministry?" Finally, after much prayer and fasting, I did what I was told or at least it appeared that I did to myself and the few people I had confided in. The minister in charge of this ministry was powerful and had the ability to have me expelled but I put my trust in God and I confronted him as I was instructed and God was with me and the outcome was positive in my eyes and I was even offered a position working under him as an assistant because of my "boldness" and "honesty" he explained.

After that I went around telling everyone about how I had done what God had asked me to do, I was feeling good about myself but He was not feeling good about me. Why? Because I was not obedient. God had told me that after I confronted the ministry I was to leave and not accept any gifts from them and I did. No, I did not take the position as his assistant event though I did consider it but I did accept two new suits from them. I told myself that it was alright because I did not have a suit to wear to church and now I could honor God in how I dressed as well as how I lived. So I accepted the suits and after that, my life began to spiral out of control, all because I was not obedient. There is no such thing as being partially obedient. You either are obedient or you're not as Saul found out in verses 20-23
20And Saul said unto Samuel, Yea, I have obeyed the voice of the LORD, and have gone the way which the LORD sent me, and have brought Agag the king of Amalek, and have utterly destroyed the Amalekites.
21But the people took of the spoil, sheep and oxen, the chief of the things which should have been utterly destroyed, to sacrifice unto the LORD thy God in Gilgal.
22And Samuel said, Hath the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams.
23For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king.

I left that ministry in disgrace after a drug relapse and even though the person who I had spoken out against also had left in disgrace before I did I had varied from God's plan and therefore did not receive my blessing. The one God had planned for me. How many times have we called ourselves being obedient, carrying out God's will but in retrospect we only were partially obedient. We carried out the parts we agreed with while not executing the parts we didn't agree with or didn't understand. Yet we go around with our chest puffed out testifying to our own goodness and obedience and at the same time things in our lives are out of control and it seems like God is not listening, maybe just maybe we are not as obedient as we think we are. I am learning there is no acceptable level of obedience accept 100% obedience. Even our very thoughts are called to be obedient, see 2nd Corinthians 10:4+5 
4(For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)
5Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

From now on before I start testifying about what I did for the Lord I'm going to shut my mouth and make sure there are no sheep bleating in my background. How about you?
                                    God bless you all, Brother Darrell, A Watchman

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